family matters :
GIVING THANKS
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In Gratitude
W e c o u n t o u r b l e s s i n g s a t
T h a n k s g i v i n g , b u t b y m a k i n g it a
y e a r - r o u n d h a b i t , w e c o u l d b e
liv in g h e a l t h i e r , h a p p ie r liv e s .
fter Jill Hart got
married in
2 0 0 0
,
she started
writing a
“grateful list” of
all the things she
oved about her
new husband, Allen. Eight years
later, whenever they argue or hit a
bump, that list softens her anger.
“Every time I read that list, it takes
me back to our dating days and
makes me smile,” says Jill, who lives
in Bellevue, Nebraska. “It includes
all of the things that made me fall
in love with him.”
Every November, American
families make an event of setting
aside one day for giving thanks. But
feeling grateful doesn’t have to be
reserved for a special occasion.
“Gratitude is valuable when we
can practice it in any given moment,”
says Patricia Carlson, executive
director of the nonprofit A Network
for Grateful Living, in Ithaca, New
York. “Gratefulness has to do with
experiencing the fullness of life.
Sometimes we look at it as a play on
words—it’s the great-fullness.”
In fact, research shows that
making gratitude a part of everyday
living promotes good health, elevates
happiness, and boosts relationships.
Psychologists say that perpetually
grateful people are optimistic and
energetic, which helps them handle
stress and illness better than those
who focus on the negative.
Hofstra University psychologist
Jeffrey Froh believes that. “Kids who
have more grateful outlooks tend to
be happier,” he says. That gratitude,
he says, is genuine appreciation for
life and the people in it. “It’s beyond,
‘I have a nice car, nice clothes.’ ”
And showing gratitude for good
work goes a long way in business,
says Bob Glantz, head of research at
Access Communications in San
Francisco. When Bob’s colleague,
Yoshi Nakamoto, hit his 10-year
anniversary at Access, the company
gave him a $
1 ,0 0 0
music store gift
certificate to buy a new drum kit.
“Yoshi is also a professional
musician,” says Bob. “I support his
music career by giving him the time
off he needs. In return, he’s loyal to
me.” Yoshi showed his appreciation
by thanking Bob in the cover lines of
his newest CD. “Gratitude pervades
our business,” he says. “It’s a virtuous
cycle. If you’re recognized for doing
a good job, that gives you added
incentive to do more.”
Sometimes, it takes losing
someone or something cherished to
reinforce gratitude. That happened
to Cynthia McKay, of Parker,
Colorado. After being raised in a
wealthy home, Cynthia lost her
parents suddenly when she was in
her 20s. If that wasn’t bad enough,
not long after her parents’ deaths,
278 \OVtMBLR2008 BETTER
HOMES
AND
GARDENS
P H O T O : V E E R
